Does your cat like being held? Have you ever put much thought into how to pick up your cat? While some cats, especially easy going cats like Ragdolls and cats that are socialized well, will put up with a lot of not so great handling, most cats have a way they prefer to be held. Picking up a cat correctly is important as it will reduce the chances of you being bitten.
Give The Cat Control
Don’t force your cat to be picked up unless it’s an absolute emergency. Instead, let them approach you on their terms. This will help build trust and reduce anxiety. Sure, it may take a little longer, but in the end it will be less stressful than getting bitten and constantly having to fight your cat. If your cat doesn’t want to be held some of the time, only pick them up when they let you.
Read Their Body Language
Pay attention to your cat’s body language because that is how your cat is going to communicate with you that they don’t want you to proceed. If they’re relaxed and comfortable, their ears will be forward, their tail will be upright, and their eyes will be soft. If they’re feeling stressed or uncomfortable, their ears may be flattened, their tail may be swishing, and their eyes may be dilated.
For more information on body language, check out my guide or Lili Chin’s fabulous book Kitty Language. It goes into more depth than I’m able to do on my blog and is very easily to read even if this is your first cat.
Be Mindful Of Yours, Too
Your body language and what it signals to your cat matters, too. Make yourself less threatening with the following tips:
- Get down to your cat’s level. This will make you seem less imposing and help them feel more comfortable.
- How you position yourself in relation to the cat matters. Many cats may appreciate being approached from the side rather than head on.
- If you can, position yourself so your side is facing toward your cat. This will make you seem smaller.
- Move slowly so your cat doesn’t instinctually run away.
Give Them A Warning
Cats thrive when their world is predictable so by knowing exactly what to expect, you can make the experience of something they don’t like somewhat less pleasant. A predictor cue is a way of communicating to your cat that something is about to happen to them. It can be a word, a touch, or a gesture.
The quick version of how to train one is to consistently do the exact same thing right before you pick them up. For gestures, you need to make sure the cat actually sees the gesture. Do it every single time before you pick up your cat and they’re eventually make the association with enough repetition.
Or Let Them Tell You They’re Ready
To add an extra layer of predictability, you can train something called a start button behavior. Basically, the cat gives you a signal that they’re ready to be held. It’s similar to if you tell the nurse giving you your flu shot that you’re ready for the injection. You can do this combined with a predictor cue where the cat says go ahead, you give the predictor cue, and then pick them up.
This is somewhat more complicated to train, but there are great courses or guides on how to do it for those interested.
Support Your Cat
When you pick up your cat, support their entire body, including their hindquarters. Be purposeful about where you place your hands. A few things to think about:
- Avoid lifting them by their tail or scruff (more on that in a moment), as this can be painful or even dangerous.
- Support your cat’s front section, being cautious with placing your hand or arm on their stomach.
- Your cat shouldn’t feel like they’re dangling or in danger of falling as that can be scary. Don’t treat them like a sack of potatoes; treat them like a living creature with emotions because that’s what they are.
If you’re not confident on how to do this, consider practicing ahead of time. A stuffed cat isn’t going to scratch you and it allows you to figure out what feels right to you as well.
A Word On Scruffing
Speaking of scruffing, let’s briefly go over why this is a problem because it used to be recommended as a way to calm your cat.
Mother cats will carry their kittens by their scruff (the skin on the back of their neck) to get them from one place to another, but this behavior stops once the kittens get a bit older. You don’t see cats being picked up by their scruff into adulthood. The positive benefits go away and there’s evidence of increased stress when cats are scruffed or when similar methods are used. In cases where cats need to have their head movement restrained, there are kinder ways to do so.
Hold Them Close, But Don’t Squeeze
Cats need to feels secure when they’re being held. If they don’t, it could seem like they’re going to fall or be dropped. At the same time, your cat shouldn’t feel like they are trapped. As a prey species, this can be scary for your cat.
The solution? Listen to your cat. If they try to wiggle away, put them down. Chances are they’re overwhelmed or you might have them held too tight. It takes time to get to know a cat. You’ll figure out what helps them safe, but not feel restrained.
Picking Up A Cat That Doesn’t Like Being Picked Up
If your cat seems upset or uncomfortable, let them down gently. Don’t force them to stay in your arms. It may take time before your cat can be handled, but going slowly will be less work in the long run.
Helping Your Get Used To Being Held
If your cat is resistant to being picked up, you can gradually desensitize them. Start by gently petting them while they’re sitting or lying down. Gradually increase the amount of time you spend petting them while moving your hands in a way that is similar to how you’ll pick them up. Eventually try gently lifting them a few inches off the ground. Reward them with treats for being calm.
If things are really not going well, check with your vet to evaluate if your cat is in pain or not feeling well. If they can’t find a medical explanation, let me know. We can set up a session to go over getting your cat comfortable with handling. Your cat may not love being held, but we can at least help them (and you) feel more comfortable being picked up when needed.
